It’s always terrifying looking back at the last day’s work, especially when I think I’ve done something brilliant, something that had flow or inspiration attached, mainly due to the risk that I’ll discover it was useless tripe that needs to be redone. ‘Cause that’s never happened before…
Anyways. Working through the plot in another format proved to be the right move, even if it was retreading ground I’ve passed over before. I’d like to think that I’d be smarter next time, more efficient, more streamlined… but I’m suspicious that the process has to be like this, iterative, a redoing and rehearsing, a niggling of elements and thoughts and tiny and great changes again and again and again… Or maybe I’ve just been making trouble for myself. Hard to say. Either way, it seemed to finally come together this time. I was able to state the story in as close to brief point form as I ever have done. There’s an arc, a continuity of motivation and resolution that I couldn’t quite purify out of the mass of complexity before. Irritatingly, it’s at the final hour, so the actual draft probably still has a great deal of confusing, but part of the trouble all along has been that I refuse to simplify right down to a single motive force. There’s always more complexity in people, in stories, in life, than that. However, distilling and teasing out the main story thread for readers is almost beyond me; it’s in there, but making it easy to see amongst all the words and switchbacks and angst in general is… well, it may or may not have actually happened. Planning to review the plot and story forms today, do a last scan over the last 10 chapters to refine things one last time, and I should probably go through and do a form for every scene, or even macro scene (shudders), but we’ll see. The appeal of just shipping it all off to the editor is immense at this point, but if I’ve learned one thing, it’s that, indispensable as they are, editors are not magic and they don’t do all (or, really, any) of the work for you. Such disappointment. Sigh.
I’ve written these things several times now, the ‘here we go again’ and ‘thank goodness it’s done’ journal entries. This won’t be the last - but it’s bittersweet and painful and joyous each time. It’s nearly done. I have a list of dozens of things to accomplish this month, at least two thirds of which, if past lists are anything to go by, won’t even come close to getting done. I need to freelance and make money. There’s that stupid side business that I should really actually launch. I need to record an audiobook preview of BtE and get it up as a newsletter incentive - and get back on track with the marketing and platform building. I really ought to plot out the BtE sequel and my sadly neglected Wattpad WIP pile as well, but most likely I’ll try to see friends and family, maybe get a tiny bit of a breather, angst about turning 30 because there’s a whole new load of trauma, and muddle around until the next deadline starts breathing down my neck. #writerslife, lol.
Start Time: 3:45 pm
Location: Abbotsford; home; chair
Drinking: Nettle, mint & chamomile tea