Day 197

Spoiler Alert! May contain planning-stage plot/character details or other spoilers!

12 May 2017

Thinking I’m gonna give up the regular Fri-Sat trip to Vancouver to see the nephew to keep pushing forward with work (and hopefully get around to that freakin’ last few freelance projects), which kinda sucks as I won’t get to see them next weekend either, but given the timeline I’m on and how much harder I find each round of rewrites, it seems worth it. Story mapping is hard - every time, I start to stumble at around the halfway point, and moving forward character development and reveals at a cohesive and comprehensible rate feels near impossible. Yeah, I make progress each time, and there are traditional books and TV and film that stumble over this stuff too, but… it’s a competitive marketplace and good-enough just isn’t. Plus I’m a crazy perfectionist high-achiever who’s never happy with what I can put out, so there’s that. Internal and external motivation! Also known as endless anxiety and depression! Hooray for the arts!

Seriously, though; it’s annoying to have all this cool backstory worked out, and almost no place to refer to it or use it in any meaningful way. And how do you have secondary character development with only one POV? So many mysteries in the background that Cole can’t know about. Frickin sucks. Of course, it would make the story like 800 pages long, but I really want to bring back in those other POV. Probably it’s some level of writing skill that I need to learn to fix the whole thing, but gah, deadlines! Onward…

Also not particularly surprising that the Audible book hasn’t moved any copies yet, but I had hoped that would emerge into a reasonable income stream in the background, and realistically I probably need to sink some time and energy into promoting that as well… yet another thing I don’t have time for, lol. Plus the chocolate startup needs some attention that I can’t really give it, and I’m concerned about its feasibility as a business in the first place… It has potential, but without a concerted effort and not an insignificant amount of gambling… yeah. But also I’m just feeling a little overwhelmed again, so things probably aren’t as rough as they feel. On the bright side, I’m in line for some non-writing freelance work in June, which could be a good way to shift gears, as well as cash in CAD$, which is something I’m getting short on what with all the international freelancing. I think it’s a better move to leave things in original currencies if at all possible, but it does get disturbing to watch my primary Canadian account dwindle since spending is all local for the moment. So yeah, I have a feeling the rates still won’t be what they should be, but better than nothing, and nice to have some work lined up for my next post-deadline stint without needing to hustle to get it!

Part 2

Right, time to suck it up and get stuff done! I’m still struggling more than I’d like to admit with the final emotional payoff in the climax; don’t want to go for the sappy cliche ending, but any time I try to step away from that I get pushback, so… hopefully teasing out the second half of the book map will inspire some next-level brilliance…

Part 3

Well, that went differently than expected. Thunderstorm knocked me out, almost literally, for a couple hours. No focus. No, like… awakeness. So. Tired. But I’m back (mostly) now, and I’d better get some solid work in to make up for giving up on family time today! Lol motivation…


Start Time: 10 am, 2 & 6 pm

Location: Abbotsford; home; couch

Drinking: Homebrewed ginger beer with cardamom

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