Day 81

Spoiler Alert! May contain planning-stage plot/character details or other spoilers!

30 Mar 2016

I can’t seem to summon any energy or focus this week. The weather changed - jumped ten degrees celsius and turned sunny basically overnight, so I’ll blame it on that. Or allergens. Or low iron. Or anything, really.

Seems like the worst thing I can do is tell myself that I need to kick it into high gear; it’s paralyzing. So much to do that I start avoiding ‘the list’ as much as possible, wasting hours on distractions.

Like writing how to get over writer’s block tips on Quora. Absurd.

Maybe I’m subconsciously afraid of finishing and having to leave this second adolescence that I’ve been basking in - all the joys of unbounded creative freedom with no true responsibilities. Or maybe I’m just full of shit. Either way, nothing stays the same for long. It would be wise to make the most of this opportunity.

Not feeling very wise at the moment, but if I can maintain a general forward trajectory, that’s something at least.

I’m concerned that my renewed passport hasn’t been delivered yet. Half a trip booked, flights and accommodations pinned down, and I can’t even apply for my visa yet. Plus, there’s a lot of unreliable components in the mix, like tenuous accommodation connections and hard to pin down budgets and timelines.

It’s going to be great. It’s going to be exhausting. I’m exhausted just thinking about it. So much pressure to make the most of every moment, see and do and…

I mostly just want to live. And create. And do awesome stuff. And break down barriers. And inspire others to more.

So the trip will be great. And then it will be time (past time) to move on to something else.


Start time: 1:45 pm

Location: couch/living room

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